• Ditzy

Mid 20s Wash-Up: Things I Wish I'd Known

There comes a time in every person’s life when you need to lock yourself in a room, make a brew, drag out the archives and do a mega wash-up of life so far. Get out your travelling maps, get out your party snaps, start pinning up bits of string and seeing the patterns. Where did you do a comedy clown-fall into your own pie? What have been your biggest regrets? Your most towering triumphs? And most importantly - what can you learn to make sure the next ten years aren’t such a dumpster fire? To help get you started, here’s a list things we wish we’d known - or done - before now.



I wish I’d trusted what people’s eyes tried to tell me

I wish I’d taken a few more buses - and a little more time - to get where I was going

I wish I’d poked my head out of more windows

I wish I hadn’t sat through so many bad films

I wish I’d worn sun cream

I wish I’d just said the sad thing we were both thinking and ended the pain

I wish I’d stayed up later on work nights with a beer in the summer

I wish I’d done less washing

I wish I’d accepted what didn’t suit me

I wish I’d been kind when I felt afraid

I wish I’d chatted more shit with my house-mates

I wish I hadn’t let other people tell me what I thought

I wish I’d left the party when I wanted to - not 5 hours, 3 buses and 8 unwanted gins later

I wish I’d overslept more

I wish I’d never tried a foam banana. Or a pickled egg

I wish I’d admitted just how difficult it was

I wish I’d just not done that life admin. It probably would have been fine

I wish I’d walked away from dangerous people, not towards them

I wish I’d discovered my favourite band sooner

I wish I’d slow-cooked more stuff on long Sundays

I wish I’d taken out less layers with me and lost less coats on club floors

I wish I hadn’t wasted so much time wishing back things that were gone forever

I wish I’d smoked more in the bath (who knew it was such a religious experience?)

I wish I’d taken more photos

I wish I’d watched less Friends on Netflix

I wish I’d just kissed him


Written and illustrated by Jess Bird

Cover illustration by Christopher Bragg

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