• Ditzy

How You Know You're Falling Again

Updated: Feb 3, 2019


Their name tastes like honey in your mouth, your name sounds like rubies in theirs


They begin to occupy that very sacred real estate in your mind; the blackness behind your eyes as you drift off the sleep


You spend your lunchtimes surreptitiously reading about their star sign


You know their smell anywhere - caught on their collar, caught in the air, caught on you

You avidly devour any reference they give you as another breadcrumb in the trail leading you closer to who they really are


A chance to bring them up in conversation is a private treat


Your music tastes begin to alter slightly, as though you’re seeing the world through a different lens


You are content to stare at blank spaces - ceilings, skies - any place where your mind can paint them all over the surface


The latest sadness stored in your heart begins to recede slightly, replaced with a cautious hope


Your world threatens to become dissatisfying every moment they aren’t in it, you wonder whether it is altered forever


You start singing - loudly and badly - in the shower, even when the morning is black and dense


Intolerance for the boring, the obligatory, the repetitive creeps in


You read yourself to sleep in their voice


You imagine a ghostly finger tracing up your arm in the lift


Every day is a good pant day


Written and illustrated by Jess Bird

Cover illustration by Christopher Bragg

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UK