• Ditzy

5 Ways His New Girlfriend Is Better Than You

Updated: Oct 9, 2018

1) She separates her plastics and has a well-maintained compost bin that smells of summer mist.


2) Her outfits are always the perfect balance of flirty, mysterious and ethereal.


3) She understands her taxes.


4) She always reads the Terms & Conditions.


5) She has never, in her life, been tempted by a Domino’s.


Words by Matilda Curtis

Illustrations by Helen Walker

Cover illustration by Christopher Bragg

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UK